THE STRUGGLE OF THE BELIEVER AFTER ACCEPTING

The way people are capitalizing on singleness is a perversion of the devil, and it is replacing the relationship between men and women with other things, like finding satisfaction in pornography, the use of Teledildonics, homosexual activity and lesbianism.

This is a very deep and sensitive topic that touches on faith, culture, and society. It is understandable why this view is held, as many share similar beliefs based on religious and traditional values.

From this standpoint, marriage and the union between a man and a woman are considered sacred and the ideal design. Promoting singleness as the ultimate state of happiness can be seen as going against natural law and divine purpose. There is a valid concern that when people avoid deep emotional connections, they turn to things that replace genuine intimacy with mere physical pleasure, which can be damaging emotionally and spiritually.

However, society today presents different views. Many see singleness as a valid life choice and argue that happiness can be found in different ways. Regarding relationships and lifestyle, what one person sees as wrong, another may see as freedom or identity. It remains a debated topic shaped by upbringing and experience.

But the core issue goes deeper than just being alone.

The mindset of finding satisfaction in singleness

The problem is not just the state of being single, but the idea that is being pushed: that singleness is the ultimate fulfillment, and that you do not need a partner to be complete.

This mindset changes what is considered "normal." Instead of looking for connection with the opposite sex, people are being taught to be self-sufficient in every way, to satisfy desires through artificial means like Teledildonics, and to accept lifestyles such as homosexual activity and lesbianism that go against the original design. It is a shift in values where the desire for marriage is being weakened or replaced by independence and instant gratification.

The enemy knows that when a man and woman come together in the right way, they become a force that fulfills God's purpose. So, his strategy is to isolate them, make them feel they don't need each other, and offer cheap substitutes that look like pleasure but bring no lasting peace.

People justifying their own choices and situations, which is fact but not truth

This is what happens: people rationalize. When they make choices that go against what they inherently know is right, their mind tries to make it feel okay. They tell themselves, "This is better," "I am complete on my own," or "This is just who I am."

It is a fact that they are doing these things, and it is their reality because it is what they see on social media and in their environment. But facts are not always the Truth.

A fact is what is happening right now, but the Truth is what should be and what is eternal. Instead of facing the struggle, the work, and the standard that was originally set, they lower the bar and redefine what "satisfaction" means to fit their lifestyle. They are twisting reality to suit themselves rather than conforming to what is true.

This is the proof. You can lie to the world that you are happy and complete, you can post pictures and pretend everything is fine, but when the noise goes away and the lights go out, the spirit knows what the flesh is trying to hide.

That emptiness is a hole that cannot be filled by screens, material things, or temporary pleasure. It was designed to be filled by true connection, companionship, and purpose—not by substitutes.

They keep trying to patch it up with new things, new habits, or different lifestyles, but it never truly goes away because they are trying to satisfy a deep spiritual need with shallow things. That is why people keep running from one thing to another, never finding rest.

"But whoever drinks of the water that I shall give him will never thirst. But the water that I shall give him will become in him a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life." — John 4:14

Only what is true can bring lasting peace.

The need to heal from this mindset

This is not just a lifestyle choice; it is a spiritual and emotional wound that needs healing. People have been deceived into thinking that being "whole alone" is strength, but really they have just built walls to protect themselves from getting hurt or from facing the truth.

To heal, they must:

1. Stop lying to themselves: Admit that the substitutes are not working and that the void is real.

2. Return to the original design: Understand that man and woman were made to complement each other, to help each other, and to become one. They were not made to exist in isolation or in confusion.

3. Wait for true satisfaction: Learn that real fulfillment comes from unity and purpose, not from instant pleasure or independence.

It takes courage to unlearn what the world is teaching and go back to what is true. But until they do, they will keep running in circles.

The religious leader’s role

Religious leaders and teachers are trying to speak the truth, but the noise of the world is louder. Social media and environment make these things seem normal because they are constantly seen and heard. It becomes the "reality" people live in.

But breaking free is possible. As it was rightly said: "They can only break free from it through the help of the Holy Spirit, a change of mindset, discipline, and determination."

Human effort and willpower alone are not enough. You cannot fix a spiritual problem with just physical methods. Breaking free requires:

- The Power of the Holy Spirit: Only He can rewrite the heart and remove the deep desires for wrong things. He is the only one that can truly fill that void permanently.

- Renewing of the Mind: Unlearning what the world taught and learning what is true from the Word of God.

- Discipline & Determination: Choosing to walk in truth even when the feelings say otherwise, and refusing to go back to the old habits.

The noise is loud, but the Truth is louder.

And when it comes to sharing this message, it must be done both ways—publicly to break the stronghold and wake up the masses, and privately to speak to the heart and bring healing. One without the other is not complete.

Reasons one should not be in a relationship

There is a clear standard given by God. The only valid reasons to remain single are:

- You are not of the age to be in a relationship: You are not yet ripe. You are still growing, learning, and preparing yourself. It is not your time yet.

- A direct order from God / you are not in the season for relationships: God has specifically asked you to wait, or He has given you a specific assignment, ministry, or purpose that requires your full attention and focus right now.

If it is not one of these two reasons, then you are single by choice, not by calling.

If you are not single for these reasons, then the desire to remain alone or find satisfaction elsewhere is not natural—it is a defense mechanism, a fear, or a wrong mindset that needs to be healed. Relationship and marriage are part of the original design, so unless God says "wait" or "not now", the heart should be open to what He created.

The need for discernment in this season

Discernment is the key.

Without it, you cannot tell the difference between:

- God saying "Wait"

- And fear or deception saying "Don't bother"

The devil uses that confusion to keep people in bondage. He makes them think they are being spiritual or "saving themselves" when really they are just running away or building walls.

That is why you need the Holy Spirit to show you the truth. To show you clearly whether you are single by Divine Design or single by self-imposed prison.

"And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God." — Romans 12:2

Wisdom is knowing the difference.

The Standard Written in The Heart and Scripture

"It is not good that the man should be alone..." — Genesis 2:18

This was God's own opinion before any religion existed. It is written in the fabric of who we are.

"Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh." — Genesis 2:24

These words are not just religious rules; they are the truth of how we were made. We were made for connection, not isolation.

Let us seek the Truth, heal our minds, and walk in the original design.

📖 Further Reading

To get a balanced understanding, read the first article on relationship called:

THE TRUTH ABOUT MODERN RELATIONSHIP

Use the link below to get access to it on your browser:

https://bethlehem.fika.bar/the-struggle-of-the-believer-after-accepting-christ-01KQQF6G7WQGZ203TJDF6060RY

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